Friday, July 10, 2009

A Prayer to Government

Oh Government, you rain down upon me with benefits to provide for all my needs. You have programs to redress nearly every social injustice, and provide for most wants. The scope of your magnanimity grows day by day.

Oh Government, though I know not where from which these numerous blessings flow, I beseech thee to not staunch them, for out of loyalty to thee I have rightly cast off my old ways and means,

and now depend upon thee for my daily bread. Only You have the power to make all things affordable.

Into your wise administration, I commend my freedoms, for what use have I of they, if by their exercise I am forced to live outside your gracious providence?

I shall shut out the heathen influcences of skeptical thought and critical analysis. Apparent failures of your many programs are due not to inefficient and corrupt execution, but lack of true faith in Your wisdom, and the solution to failure is bigger and more.

I humble myself before you and acknowledge my personal inability to provide for my own desires.

Forgive me, and give to me...gimmie gimmie gimmie gimmie!

Yes we can (has cheezburger)!